I remember when I was a kid and my parents used to drop me at the school gate. I almost never thought what expectation do they have unless I was ten year old. I remember my class mates who were even in high school and they never realized what expectations do their parents have when they send you to the school. The point I am trying to make here is that the onus is on parents to help children understand their expectations. Now there could be tussle between parent's expectation Vs child expectation. Parents have to make sure that they need to strike a balance. Before understanding parent's expectation let's think
What a child expects -
- Fun at school
- Reading the subject he likes
- Not attending the class which he doesn't like
- Watching cartoon or moving in the class
- And many other child level fantasies…
Now comes parent's expectations-
- My child should perform as one of the best students in the class and school
- My child should perform as one of the best players in the class and school
- My child should perform one of the best at cultural activities in the class and school
- My child should respect parents, teachers and elders
- My child should look energetic all the time
- My child should finish lunch box
- My child shouldn't hide anything from me
Let's Strike a Balance
- Parents should invest quality time with child and understand what he likes and dislikes. He is shaping his own identity and he may not do exactly what you think him to do. A great article Quality time with kids: Let's have a Quality Audit should help the readers spend quality time with your little one.
- Parents should understand that their child is not a machine who should look energetic all the time and will not hide anything from them. We have also been children and we also hid many things from our parents when we were kids.
- Child may do great in one subject whereas he may lack interest in other. As a parent our responsibility is to figure this out and help the child in understanding the subject where he doesn't do good.
- There could be some scenarios when the child will not obey or listen to the teachers. A great post Guidance on Child not Obeying Teacher should help the readers handle this situation.
- I also suggest parents to understand that words are important. Unfortunately having this expectation with child will not work but parents can change the experience of their parenting as well as child's experience of his childhood if they learn that words are important.
- Make sure you understand which subject your kid needs more help and use the Hack To Help Kids Study The Difficult Subjects.
- Make sure you invest time educating your little one on how to become a good student using Golden Rules
- I am not a proponent of "let the child do what he wants". Because then what is our role as a parent. Shouldn't we invest time in helping the child focus where the world is going? Shouldn't we invest time with our child helping him the subject he does poor. Let me share a situation that I expect my five year old son to write one to hundred. He didn't even after I tried multiple tricks. I determined to understand what is blocking him then I figured out that he gets confused when he writes 2, 3, 6, 7 and 9. He writes mirror image of these numbers most of the time. I also observed that he can write A to Z and has issue in writing J. Now I played a trick. I told him 2, 3, 7 and 9 resemble D whereas 6 resembles C. And guess what now he enjoys writing numbers. The same child started having fun doing counting who used to loathe it just some days back.
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